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anitaray went off on vacation without sending us Chapter 31. Consequently, erastes sporked it.


In which everyone forgets they are wizards from time to time, Hagrid turns into someone else completely and hundreds of children are marched to their death.

Chapter Thirty-One -- The Battle of Hogwarts

Henry V it AIN'TCollapse )
Today's sporking is by anitaray. She's on vacation until February 20th.


Chapter 30: The Sacking of Severus Snape

In which Harry runs about hither and tither watching other people do stuff, and Voldemort chills for a bit. A LONG bit.

Also, Ginny, that supposedly powerful witch, is considered too young to fight, and we learn that torturing people is noble...if your name is Harry Potter.Collapse )

Chapter Twenty-Nine -- The Lost Diadem

Today's chapter was team-sporked by quinby and minkhollow.


In which JKR crams the book we all wanted to be reading into half a chapter, the DA's remnants have out-thought the Trio, and Ravenclaw has the best common room ever.

Chapter Twenty-Nine -- The Lost Diadem

Also, the Trio are on a mission from Glod, Harry is full of Dumb, and there's actually something resembling a cliffhanger.Collapse )
In which the Trio has a run-in with Dementors, Death Eaters can't tell stags from goats, Aberforth reveals some unpleasant truths about his brother, and the other Prophecy Boy finally makes an appearance.

Note: This is from the British edition. Readers of the American edition may notice some differences in the text.

Chapter Twenty-Eight -- The Missing Mirror

Also, portraits do things that they really shouldn't do, and Harry Potter lies like a Persian rug.Collapse )
In which JKR proves that she can even make dragon riding dull, Voldemort kills more than the messenger and Harry makes (yet) another stupid decision

Chapter Twenty-Seven
The Final Hiding Place

Please welcome the Dragon Riders of Yawn....Collapse )

Chapter Twenty-Six -- Gringotts

Today's spork is by minkhollow.


In which Gringotts appears to have taken advantage of security testing, the Trio did not plan for a bank full of nuns what would happen if they were suspected/caught, and a few of the plot points were cooler the first time people used them.

Chapter Twenty-Six -- Gringotts

Also, Griphook is a sneaky little bastard.Collapse )

Chapter Twenty-Five Shell Cottage

In which nothing much happens Remus is spectactularly stupid and the cottage is a TARDIS and I spend most of it obsessing about who and how many are in each bedroom.

But first... Description!Collapse )

Chapter Twenty- Four -- The Wandmaker

Today's spork is by asphodeline.


In which we have character death, plot assassination and grammarcide and we learn that a wizard's wand follows the wizard or sometimes doesn't or maybe it does. Who knows? Ollivander doesn't. Oh and everything suddenly makes sense to Harry.

Lucky Harry...

Chapter Twenty-Four -- The Wandmaker

Also, Harry turns gravedigger, Voldemort turns grave robber, and Snape has a cameo.Collapse )

Chapter Twenty-Three -- Malfoy Manor

In which Harry suffers a frontal lobe migraine for most of the chapter, the Random Death Eaters show common sense, Rowling completely ignores her own set-up for a character arc, all the wizards forget that they're wizards and Dobby is a deus ex machina.

Chapter Twenty-Three -- Malfoy Manor

Also, Fenrir is creepily stalkerish, and everyone gets CAPSLOCKY.Collapse )

Chapter 22 --The Deathly Hallows

Once again, we have smurasaki as today's sporker.


In which I wonder once again why the series isn’t “Hermione Granger and the…,” Harry turns into Gollum, and the Trio is captured in the stupidest way imaginable.

Chapter Twenty-Two: The Deathly Hallows

Also, wizards prove to have no concept of homicide investigation, and we learn the worst code names in the history of espionage.Collapse )